“It’s difficult to give advice on how to navigate love, and you’ve got to figure these things out for yourself. But know when there are red flags and what toxic relationships can develop into. Don’t settle with one person just because you do the math in your mind and go, ‘How many billion people are on this planet? How many are in Boston? How many are the same gender as I am that I’m attracted to, exclusively attracted to in my age range? Who is an extrovert that has brown hair and this height with this body type?’ You start making that list and do the math and when you get that one unicorn, you go, ‘I don’t care if you have all this baggage or that you might be unstable and dabbling too much in drugs and alcohol.’ You just bond because you’re not sure whether you’ll find that unicorn again. Love is blind. It’s probably a cliche, but part of that is true. Self love, Whitney Houston said, is the best kind of all. But sometimes you kind of have to go through a few bad apples before you find the right one. It’s all a learning experience but never settle for less than you deserve and know that there are many people out there that you will find love and happiness with.”
— Dr. Kyle Gobrogge (he/him, they/them), 40, cis-male, pansexual.
