“I remember it was April 27th, 2019. That was the day I bought my first dress; it was a skirt specifically. I remember I heard the album Expectations by Hayley Kiyoko for the first time. And I remember I was in a class at Emerson College called Developing Aesthetic Sensibility, led by P Carl who is an amazing teacher, trans activist, and author. We had an assignment where we had to do journal entries about things that we liked and art that we experienced. So I did an entry on that album. And I remember writing, ‘This is the kind of attraction to women that I really appreciate. This sapphic attraction to women is a lot more gentle and soft, and is more in touch with emotions. And it was just something I relate to more than anything by a male popstar.’ So that was a catalyst for reevaluating myself and my emotions, and understanding that, ‘Okay...I’m definitely not a man.’
It was at the end of my second semester of sophomore year. Everything was winding down so I had a lot of time to go and research this. Watched a lot of youtube videos. Read a lot of articles. It’s like I had known that non-binary people existed. I definitely knew what gay men or bisexuals or pansexuals were. But non-binary was always kind of foreign. So I reached out to non-binary friends and said, ‘Hey...I’m thinking that I might be non-binary.’ So they helped me by answering a lot of questions. Specifically my friend Jay, they’re wonderful. They answered a lot of questions. I was like, ‘Hey, can I do this?’ And they were like, ‘Yeah.’ And I was like, ‘Wow.’ So I felt like I had freedom to discover myself. Coming out to myself was exciting. And now I want to grow as a person. My friends provided me with a space to test the waters with my new name and pronouns. They provided me with a space to grow. So when I finally came out to the world, I felt like I had the strength and confidence to stand up.”
— Riley Greenstein (they/them), 22, non-binary, lesbian.
